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If you are a religious person, going to church is likely part of your weekly routine. I am a Christian and try to go to church every single week because it’s important for my faith but sometimes it does not happen. Most people who skip church have no valid reasons for doing so and stay home because they overslept or just didn’t want to go. While I do occasionally oversleep, a vast majority of the time that is not the case and there is usually something that prevents me from being able to leave my home. I have had a disability my whole life, and by now, I have learned ways to adapt my life to accommodate my disability but even though I have my stoma issues and migraine pain are controlled a vast majority of the time, unexpected disasters still happen that is beyond my control. If you go to my church, you may see me most weeks because I enjoy doing things in person but, you may notice that sometimes I miss more church services than the average person. Did I skip church because I was lazy and wanted to sleep in? Yes, sometimes I do sleep in because we all have our moments. but most times, I have valid reasons for staying home. In this post, I am going to talk about some valid reasons why I stayed home and you didn’t see me in church.
I was sick – I am so glad that I very rarely sick and that my disability doesn’t weaken my immune system in any significant way making me sick all the time. Some people will go out in public when they are ill, but personally I don’t think you should go out in public when you are ill unnecessarily because you never know who around you has a chronic illness and can catch your common cold, and it affect them ten times more than it affected you. As a disabled person, I know that if I catch the common cold from one of my peers, I will probably recover rather quickly with minimal medication and no hospitalizations but, that may not be the case for all disabled people. Some disabled people with chronic illnesses have weaker immune systems, and can’t fight off the common cold as easily as most people and can become severely ill. If you are sick and do not need to be out, please stay home, because going to public places unnecessarily with your sick germs is inconsiderate to the people around you. I never go to church when I am sick because no one wants my germs and you will recover faster when you stay home to rest and avoid going to public places, where you might pick up more germs. I do not blame people for going to work sick because not everyone has a lot of sick days but you don’t need to be at church when you are sick. Many churches have virtual services and you can watch the service online so there is no excuse for coming to church with the flu unless you work there and have no choice!
I was on my period– When I am on period I do not like to leave my home because my period tends to affect me more severely than the average woman since and I not only have the normal problems that every woman gets but it also affect my bowel function more severely making it nearly impossible to have a bowel movement the first two days of my period. If I am on my period and have a doctors appointment I’ll go to my appointment but I will not do optional things such as church because it gives me too much anxiety and a lot can go wrong. I can’t wear tampons like most women can because they are too uncomfortable and pads don’t seem to provide a lot of extra protection either which can make me more prone to accidents. If my period is light sometimes I’ll go to church but most times I will stay home because I often have a lot of bowel problems during the week of my period and a lot can go wrong that would be embarrassing for me and make more work for someone else. Staying home on my period is the safest option because only have limited control over my bowel function and if I were to have a period accident I’d rather have only my family know about it than the entire church congregation.
I had a random bowel movement- My bowel regimen gives me the ability to have bowel movements independently, and a vast majority of the time, it works fine and I only may deal with a little bit of stoma leakage, which doesn’t typically prevent me from going places but it’s not a cure and sometimes it doesn’t work as well as it could have. When I do my bowel regimen most of the time I have no problems and nothing disastrous happen but unfornately I don’t know how good it worked until the following day and I am having random unplanned bowel movements. Most of the time I try not to do my bowel regimen on a Saturday because it increases the likelihood of me having random unplanned bowel movement and not being able to go to church but if I am about to get my period sometimes I have no choice. In the morning, I am usually still fasting when I go to church and don’t often have issues until after I eat a meal, but depending on the severity of my constipation sometimes my body doesn’t need food and all it takes is a little movement. I sometimes go to church with minor bowel problems but if I am constantly running to the bathroom I stay home because it’s too risky. Thankfully bowel problems that prevent me from going to church do not happen often but they do occasionally do and there is not a lot I can do to totally prevent them because I change the fact my bowels do not work properly..
I got a migraine- If you were to ask me if I am going to church tomorrow, I would probably tell you “that’s the plan” or “I sure hope so” but the truth is, I never know if I will be able to make it to church until the day of because sometimes I wake up with severe pain due to migraine. If I have mild symptoms, I sometimes go to church, but the vast majority of the time, when my migraine symptoms are flaring, I do not leave my home. because it often makes things worse and makes the recovery much longer than it has to be. Most of the time, when I skip church, it’s because I feel like I may get a migraine soon or it’s too late and I already have a full-blown attack, and going to church would only worsen these symptoms. I recently had two horrible migraine attacks close together and probably will be able to go to church tomorrow, but I can’t say with certainty that will be my reality because sometimes my body surprises me and has a mind of it’s own. I wake up with severe pain, all the time and sometimes it goes away after coffee but most times it takes hours or even weeks to get some relief. If I am having an migraine attack I will not go anywhere unless I have to because a lot of the time I can’t handle outside triggers and it’s better to stay home and focus on self-care. My migraine pain is unpredictable and although sometimes it may look like I have no valid reasons for not going to church, I often have severe pain that you cannot see. If I am having a migraine attack I sometimes can push through the pain but there is no point in forcing myself to go to church because chances are I will be focused on my high pain levels and not listening to the message anyway.
I was lazy- I would love to say that I have valid reasons for skipping church every single time but sometimes I don’t. A vast majority of the time I have real reasons for not going but I am human and sometimes I sleep in or was too lazy to get dressed.
When I skip church, sometimes it’s because I was lazy and didn’t want to go but most times, I have valid reasons for staying home. Church is important for my faith but when you live with chronic migraine or any type of chronic pain it sometimes can be hard because on bad pain days you barely have the energy to get out of bed and some people don’t understand that. I always plan to go to church, but it doesn’t always happen because I live with a disability that doesn’t take a vacation on Sundays. When you are disabled and live with pain, it can be really hard to be consistent with going to church due to the severe pain because if I could plan every flare to where it was convenient, I’d never miss church but unfornately I can only control my pain to a certain extent. Most people that skip church have no valid reason and sometimes people may assume that everyone who doesn’t go to church has slept in but for many disabled that is not always true. Virtual services are convenient for able-bodied people, but they are necessary for disabled people because not all disabled people are able to drive to church or live with unpredictable pain that would prevent them going. If you see me at church, it’s probably a good but if you don’t see me, it doesn’t me, I slept in and a lot of time it means I was not well enough to leave my home. If you go to church, what things stop you from attending?
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