When you have Spina Bifida, it is common for your bladder and bowel muscles to be affected and not work properly. There are ways to manage bladder and bowel problems with Spina Bifida, but you cannot fix them, and not everyone will do the same things. I chose to get a stoma for both my bladder and bowel because it gives me the ability to be able to go to the bathroom independently, but not everyone sees the positives of having a stoma. When you tell people that you have a stoma, sometimes people are horrified and will tell you to get rid of it or get a second opinion because they don’t understand how a stoma changes and saves lives. It is frustrating to live with a stoma sometimes because you have to deal with stoma leakage you wouldn’t have without a stoma, but not everything about a stoma is negative. A stoma has a lot of negatives, but it’s not all bad, and there is a lot of good that comes with having a stoma. What are the positives of having a stoma? In this post, I am going to talk about a few positives that I have gotten from my stoma’s.
It gives you independence- When you have Spina Bifida, it is more difficult to go to the bathroom because these muscles don’t work, and you can’t sit on the toilet and go naturally like everyone else can. It is possible to go to the bathroom without a stoma, and a lot of people do, because you can take a lot of laxatives and go to the bathroom, but in my opinion, it’s so much harder. My stoma has given me independence because before I had one, I relied on others to help me go to the bathroom. I sometimes have bad body image days and struggle with accepting my stoma, but the freedom and independence my stoma gives me are well worth a couple of bad body image days I may have. I have had friends who didn’t have a stoma that would carry a mirror around with them to pee, but I don’t think I would ever want to do that because going to the bathroom would take twice as long, and you never know how accessible public restrooms are going to be. A stoma is not the most visually appealing thing you will ever see, but you get one because it makes your life easier, not to make a fashion statement.
It allows me to easily relieve constipation– Before I had an ACE (which stands for Antegrade Colonic Enema) and is the stoma I had that is connected to my bowel, I struggled with constipation. I can remember being in so much pain and not being able to get relief for hours because someone was not always available to help me, and I can’t always expect people to drop everything to help me have a bowel movement. Disasters happen, and if I am really constipated sometimes, I may need assistance, but a vast majority of the time, I can manage my constipation without help because I can go to the bathroom whenever I want and work my bathroom schedule around my caregiver’s schedule. My stoma has given me the ability to relieve pain from constipation, and as soon as I start to feel like I might have a problem, I am able to deal with which I couldn’t do as easily before my stoma. I can have bowel movements on my schedule instead of someone else’s, which is often inconvenient, and I love the freedom my stoma gives me. Pain from constipation is frustrating, and you want nothing more than to get out of pain as quickly as possible. My stoma did not cure my constipation problems because I can’t change my disability, but it does help me manage them a little easier.
It gives me some level of privacy- Disabled people do not have privacy like non-disabled people do, because sometimes we require assistance with tasks from our caregivers that a non-disabled person wouldn’t need. There are times when my bowel regimen is not working, and I had a massive explosion that I couldn’t clean up myself, but a vast majority of the time, everything works fine, and I am able to go to the bathroom without anyone there. When you are disabled and a full-grown adult, sometimes you can feel a little uncomfortable when you need help to go to the bathroom, and because of my stoma, I do have a little more privacy than someone who is completely dependent on others. Some people with Spina Bifida require assistance even with a stoma because not everyone has the ability to stand, and some people struggle more than others. I have days when I do require assistance, but I am fortunate that most of the time I have complete privacy and don’t need help.
A stoma has more negatives than positives, but it does change your life for the better because it gives you independence that you would not have without it. It can be frustrating to have a stoma because it leaks constantly, but not having one doesn’t necessarily make all these issues go away, and you struggle with different things. People sometimes don’t want to get a stoma because they can’t get past the idea that they have a hole on their body and that is okay because it is not always required. A stoma has both positives and negatives, but if you can look past the negatives, it will be easier to see how much a stoma can positively impact your life. You don’t get a stoma to make a fashion statement, and you get one because it’s functional and can make your life easier. Don’t let anyone tell you that getting rid of your stoma will cure you because it doesn’t and often makes your life harder. My stoma has not cured all my bathroom struggles but it has made it easier to manage. These are some of the positives I have experienced with my stoma, but I don’t speak for everyone with a stoma because some people may have a different type of stoma than I do. What are the positives of your stoma? If you liked this post, please share this post with your friends and leave a comment below.
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