When you are disabled, sometimes you have more negative healthcare experiences than non-disabled people because you have a lot of health issues that require a lot of specialist visits. It can be difficult to advocate for yourself as a disabled person because doctors sometimes believe disability stigma and think that disabled people are not capable of speaking for themselves. As a disabled person, I have seen some dismissive doctors but for the most part, I have been blessed with doctors who listen and care about their patients. There is nothing more frustrating than when you are in pain and your doctor is telling you that it’s just anxiety and what you’re experiencing is not real and is the reason a lot of patients are very bitter toward healthcare professionals. How do you get your doctor to listen and take your pain seriously? In this post, I am going to talk about what you can do if your doctor is dismissing your pain and not listening to you.
Bring an advocate with you- Doctors should treat disabled patients in the same way that they would to non-disabled patients but unfortunately, not all doctors do, and sometimes will talk down to their disabled patients. It can be very difficult to advocate for yourself as a disabled person because sometimes doctors don’t take you seriously. Many disabled people are capable of driving themselves to the doctor without an advocate, but if you have struggled to get doctors to listen to you it can help to have an advocate with you because sometimes doctors will not listen to the disabled person experiencing pain but will listen to the non-disabled advocate. As a disabled person, I have never gone to doctor appointments alone because I can’t drive and most doctors that I have seen do listen, but it can be helpful to bring an advocate with you to your appointments for all the times they dismiss you. It is frustrating that sometimes disabled people have to bring an advocate with them to get their needs met because it shouldn’t be that way but sometimes it’s your best option.
Get a second opinion– When someone sees your disability, a lot of the time they will tell you to get a second opinion, which is not always necessary because it doesn’t matter how many opinions you get, you can’t cure something that is not curable. As a disabled person, I don’t get second opinions every time someone tells me I should because if I did, I wouldn’t stop getting second opinions, but I do think there is a time and place for them. If your doctor is not listening to you or is trying to convince you to get a major surgery that you don’t think you need, it might be a good idea to get a second opinion. You are not tied to your doctor, and it is okay to get a second opinion if you aren’t happy with the first one. Second opinions are sometimes necessary, and I would encourage anyone who feels dismissed by their doctor to get a second opinion.
Start crying– I have never had to cry at a medical appointment to get my doctor to listen to me, but I am not beneath it. There is no guarantee that your doctor will take you more seriously if you start crying because some doctors don’t care but sometimes showing a little emotion can show doctors how much your pain has affected you, and sometimes you have to cry to reach your doctor’s soft spot.
Write them a bad review- I am not usually the type of person to write a letter of complaint but if you caused me a lot of medical trauma you best believe I am writing a terrible Google review. Sometimes you may feel a little bad about writing a poor public review, but it is so important that you do because a lot of the time patients read the reviews before making an appointment and chances are they are not going to go to a doctor if ninety percent of the reviews are bad. I don’t necessarily think writing a bad review is wrong and can save a lot of patient agony from going to a dismissive doctor. I always read reviews before going to a new doctor and if most of them are good I know I will probably have a good experience.
Ask them why they are refusing certain test– When you are a patient, you can’t always expect doctors to order the right test that will give you answers. Sometimes you have to advocate for yourself and tell doctors what types of tests they need to order because doctors don’t know your body better than you do. Some doctors will order tests that their patients ask them to order, but sometimes they won’t because they think they know better. If your doctor is refusing to order a test that you think you need, ask them why they are refusing to order a test and put it in writing, because sometimes you need proof that they are refusing care. You may be surprised that sometimes doctors do have a good reason for not ordering a specific test, and patients just don’t understand the reason behind it because we didn’t go to medical school.
When you are disabled, it is not always easy to find a doctor who listens to you and understands the challenges of your disability. Disabled people are sometimes forced to go to a dismissive doctor because they are the only ones in their area who are qualified to treat their disability. Specialist appointments are stressful, and doctors don’t always give you good recommendations because they don’t know everything. There are a lot of things about your disability that your doctor probably didn’t learn in school, which is why it’s so important to learn to advocate for yourself. These days, it can be difficult to know who to trust, and you don’t have to listen to every recommendation your doctor gives you because, at the end of the day, it’s your body. Advocacy is a very good skill to have because sometimes it doesn’t matter what you say, people won’t listen, and you need to stand up for yourself. What do you do when your doctor is not listening to you? If you liked this post, please leave a comment below and share it with your friends.
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