When something is not working and going your way, often people get upset and start yelling because they are frustrated. As a disabled person with a physical disability, I get frustrated more often than most people because we live in an inaccessible world that sometimes prevents me from being able to do things independently that I should be able to. Some things in life are within our control, but we don’t have complete control over the outcome of everything, and sometimes we get upset over things that are out of our control. My disability has taught me to let go of things that are not within my control because there are too many stresses in life to waste on things that we could not have done better. I try not to stress about things that I cannot control, but I am human, and sometimes it happens, and I have to remind myself that it’s silly to get angry over things that I only have some control over. In this post, I am going to share five things in life that you should not get upset over because they are not within your complete control.
When illness you catch- Regular exercise and healthy eating can help lower your risk of developing cancer, but it does not make you immune to illness and only slightly lowers your risk. You have control over what you put in your body, but you don’t have control over what is in the air or what is in your food that can make you sick. Sometimes we do everything within our power to avoid illness, but still get violently ill because we are not in control over what illnesses we are exposed to. We do what we can to avoid getting cancer, but at the end of the day, we only have some control over whether that will happen. Illness is not always your fault, and most times you don’t know what made you so sick.
What other people are doing around you- You don’t have to agree with the way your friends are treating their bodies, but you cannot physically force them to stop smoking, and that is something they have to do on their own. The actions of others are not within your control, and the only thing you can do is talk to people who are doing things that concern you and hope that they will listen to you. You cannot physically force people to stop doing harmful things and the only thing that you can do that is within your control is to distance yourself from that person. People sometimes get overly upset with the things other people are doing, but we shouldn’t be concerned about what other people are doing because we are only in control of our own actions. If you want to change people, be a good role model for them because you can’t force people to do everything you want them to.
The way your body looks- Diet culture often leads people to believe that if you exercise enough and eat healthy that you can get your body to look a certain way. Exercising and eating healthy can change your body, but despite what some people believe, you do not have complete control over how your body looks. You can be doing the best workout and eating healthy, and still not achieve the body you think you should have, because we are not in control over how those workouts affect our physical appearance. Everyone has bad body image days, and that is okay because that is part of being a human; you will still have bad body image days regardless of how toned you are. When I exercise, I try not to achieve a certain body type and appreciate the one I was given because your dream body is not always possible, and wanting to look like a celebrity is not a realistic goal to work toward. You can control what types of foods you eat and how often you exercise but you do not have control over how these things affect you.
How your medication affects you- When you are disabled or chronically ill sometimes you need medication to function and stay out of the hospital. We can only hope that our medication will help us have less pain but whether that happens is out of our control. You have complete control over how often you take your meds, but you cannot control whether those meds will improve your life or make it worse. Sometimes we start taking medication with the hopes that we will feel better, but the opposite happens, and we become sicker. It is frustrating when you have a lot of pain and every medication you have been prescribed does not work but you can’t control that and the only thing you can do is listen to your doctor and hope they find something that does work. If a medication does not work, it is not your fault because even though a specific medication works well for one person that doesn’t mean everyone who is prescribed that medication will feel better.
What family you are born into– We can pick our friends and have complete control over who we are friends with, but we are not in control of who our family members are and what families we are born into it. Do you have to like everyone in your family? No, absolutely not, but you can’t avoid seeing family members unless they refuse to attend family functions because the family you were born into is not within your control. Every family has issues, and you don’t have to be close with everyone in your family or go out to lunch with people who physically drain you, but you don’t get to choose who your family is. Sometimes we have to be around family members we don’t like because they are family, and there is not a lot you can do to change that, because the only thing you can do is try and make the best of it.
When you are disabled, everything in life is hard, and sometimes I find myself stressing about things that I shouldn’t be stressed about because it’s not within my control. You don’t have to like the way someone is doing something, but you can’t force people to do it in another way because you are only in control of your own actions, not of other people. Stressing about things that you cannot control can make someone unhappy because when you beat yourself up over an outcome that didn’t turn out the way you wanted it to, you feel like a failure. Don’t stress about things you cannot control, and if you find yourself doing that, take a step back and remind yourself that sometimes bad things in life happen because when we can put our energy into things we can control, we are happier human beings. What things in life have you stressed about that were not in your complete control? If you liked this post, please leave a comment below and share it with your friends.
If you liked this post, please be sure to check out my post on five things in life you can control
Subscribe And Never Miss A Post
My Rockin Disabled Life 
Thanks for this thoughtful post! Your take on what we can’t control really hit home—especially the parts about illness and body image. It’s a good reminder that doing our best doesn’t always mean we’ll get the results we want, and that’s okay. I really appreciate how you encourage self-compassion and letting go of what’s out of our hands.
LikeLike