When you have endometriosis, sometimes you feel misunderstood because most people don’t understand how serious it can be and think it’s just a bad period. You can do your best to try to explain to people without endometriosis that it’s not just bad period pain, but you will never get people to understand a health condition they have not experienced. Most people want to support their loved ones in pain, but it can be hard when you don’t understand what they are going through, and sometimes people mean well and say things that can be a little insensitive or rude without trying to be. People with endometriosis or any kind of chronic pain need more support than someone without pain, but sometimes we feel like our loved ones are being dismissive and aren’t supporting us. Pain affects all areas of your life, and it’s not just physical but can affect your mental health because severe chronic pain can cause depression. How can you support someone who lives with endometriosis? In this post, I am going to talk about a few things you should not say to someone struggling with endometriosis if you want to be a supportive friend.
I get bad period pain too– Endometriosis is a disease where tissue similar to the lining of the uterus grows outside of the uterus, in places it does not belong. People with endometriosis often experience more severe period pain than someone without the condition, and it is often believed to be just a bad period. Endometriosis is a chronic, full-body disease that can attack any major organ of your body and can get worse over time, and it does not end with period pain. Some people with endometriosis experience bladder pain, constipation, and severe chronic pain outside of their period because you can have symptoms when you are not on your period. People sometimes think that they can relate to period cramps, and to some level, you might be able to, but unless you have endometriosis, you will never truly understand the severe pain this condition causes. Don’t ever tell someone with endometriosis that you get bad period cramps, too, because it’s insensitive to the severe pain someone may be experiencing.
Are you able to have kids? – Endometriosis can make it more difficult to have children, and it is not uncommon for someone with endometriosis to struggle with fertility, which is why early treatment is so important, because the earlier you treat the disease, the less likely it is to affect fertility. I will never ask a married couple when they are planning to start a family because you never know what someone is going through or if they are able to have children, but I would especially not ask someone with a medical condition. Some people with endometriosis are able to have kids, while others find out they have it because they couldn’t get pregnant. You should never ask someone with endometriosis if they are planning to have children because you never know if someone who wants kids is not able to and is triggered by your comment. I hate that women often are pressured to have kids because not everyone wants them, or is able to have them.
Take some pain medication and you will feel better- People with endometriosis often are prescribed some kind of pain medication because over-the-counter pain meds often don’t touch endometriosis pain. When you are in a flare, sometimes people will say, “Take some pain medication and you will feel better,” because they think they are being helpful. Pain medication can help some people with endometriosis get pain relief, but it does not work miracles, and some people may get very little relief from it if any at all. You should never tell someone with endometriosis that they just need to take pain medication to feel better because it doesn’t always make you feel better. There are so many ways to get relief from pain, and taking medication is only one piece of the puzzle.
Surgery will cure you- Medication and birth control can give you some symptom relief, but it does not stop the progression of the disease, and surgery is the only way to treat endometriosis. Surgery can help some people get symptom relief, but it does not cure endometriosis, and some people may not get complete symptom relief after having surgery because sometimes there are other things causing their pain. It can be harmful advice to tell someone with endometriosis that surgery will cure them because endometriosis currently has no cure. Some people with endometriosis may need multiple surgeries because lesions can grow back, and surgery is by no means a cure.
I know someone with endometriosis, so I understand- People sometimes think that because they are a woman and get period cramps or know someone with endometriosis, that they understand. Every woman can relate to period cramps, but not all women can relate to the unbearable pain people with endometriosis experience on their period. People sometimes think they understand because they know someone with endometriosis, but I promise you don’t. People with endometriosis want to be believed that their pain is real, and you don’t have to be able to relate to it because most people can’t.
It looks like you have gained weight- Weight changes are common for people with endometriosis, and some people lose weight because pain is so severe that they have no appetite, while others may be taking hormonal birth control and gain weight. Bloating is not something that only happens to people with IBS, and many people with endometriosis struggle with bloating because people with endo often struggle with constipation. People with endometriosis sometimes are very self-conscious of the way their body looks, and you should never say “it looks like you have gained weight, or you lost a lot of weight and must be so much healthier. Weight gain is not always bad, and weight loss is not always good, and can be a sign that someone is not well. Many people with chronic illnesses can be triggered by body comments, and it’s best to keep them to yourself.
Eat healthy, and you’ll get better- Diet plays a major role in pain management, and you can get significant pain relief by following an anti-inflammatory diet. A healthy diet can slow the progression of endometriosis, but eating more broccoli will not stop the progression of the disease, and it will only slightly improve symptoms. I always advise people with pain to eat healthy to improve their symptoms, but you will never hear me tell someone that they will get better if they stop eating dessert. I have made several diet changes that have improved some of my pain, but it has not cured me, and I still experience a lot of pain because healthy eating doesn’t cure everything. Pain sometimes does not improve even after you have changed your diet.
Endometriosis is a hard condition to live with because there are very little treatment options and you are always battling pain that most people will never understand. You don’t have to try to relate to someone’s condition because most people can’t, and the best kind of support you can give someone is to listen and believe them. There is nothing worse than being around a friend or family member and feeling like you have to prove to them that your pain is real because everyone wants approval from their loved ones. Disabled and chronically ill people sometimes don’t have good support systems because even people in your own family sometimes don’t see how much you are struggling. It is so important to support people in your life in pain because when you have a good support system, it’s easier to cope with your condition, and you are less likely to get depressed when you don’t feel alone. What do you think people should not say to someone with endometriosis? If you liked this post, please leave a comment below and share it with your friends.
Subscribe And Never Miss A Post
My Rockin Disabled Life 