When you are disabled, everything in life is hard because we live in an inaccessible world that thinks accessibility only benefits disabled people. Disability changes you, and I am not the person that I am today because of disability, which is not necessarily a bad thing, and I wouldn’t want to change that. I see the world differently because of my disability and have a greater appreciation for the little things that non-disabled people sometimes take for granted. There are some things that my physical disability prevents me from being able to do, but it has also made me more aware of my habits, and there are some things you will never see me do because it’s either bad for your health or hurtful to others. What will you never see me do as a disabled person? In this post, I am sharing a few things that I avoid doing as a disabled person.
You will never see me go sky-diving– When you have Hydrocephalus, any activity where the pressure changes can be super dangerous and cause shunt problems. I don’t understand why anyone would want to jump out of an airplane, and I don’t think I would have any desire to do that if I weren’t disabled. I most definitely am not going to do that while living with Hydrocephalus because a lot can go wrong, and people with Hydrocephalus should not even consider skydiving before talking to their doctor to make sure it’s safe. I have seizures when I fly on an airplane in a controlled environment, and I can’t even begin to imagine what could happen if I were to jump out of plane.
You will never hear me use the word retarded- I sometimes will slip up and use the word handicapped even though I don’t like that word because I am surrounded by people who use it all the time. Non-disabled people sometimes will call someone retarded but you will never hear me use that word because it’s offensive to disabled people. When you call someone retarded it makes fun of people with severe intellectual disabilities and implies you are just as stupid as they are, and this word should not be in your vocabulary. As a disabled person, I am more aware of how harmful these words are than a non-disabled person, and because of my disability, I am more mindful of the language I use when I talk about disability.
You will never see me hold in my pee for long periods of time unnecessarily- If you are out in public, you may not always have access to a bathroom and may have to hold it longer than you would have if you had access to a bathroom. Sometimes I am in a situation where I need to go to the bathroom but have to wait because there is no bathroom available, but never will you see me hold in my pee for long periods of time if I don’t have to. It is okay if you occasionally have to hold it in longer than you would have, but you don’t want to make that a habit because it will weaken your bladder over time and eventually cause problems. My bladder muscles have never worked properly, and because of my disability, I think I am more mindful of the things I do that could potentially harm my bladder. Non-disabled people sometimes don’t think about these things because they don’t have difficulty going to the bathroom, but when you are disabled, you are thinking about that constantly.
I will never go long periods of time without having a bowel movement– When you have Spina Bifida, often it is more difficult to have a bowel movement because a lot of the time you have paralysis in your bowel muscles and can’t go as easily as someone without Spina Bifida. People with Spina Bifida are more prone to constipation, and bowel movements can be very time-consuming and take some people hours. No one wants to spend hours sitting on the toilet, but never will you see me go long periods of time without having a bowel movement because that is terrible for your body. It is impossible for me to completely prevent constipation, and I know what it feels like to get severely constipated. Some disabled people struggle more to go to the bathroom, but everyone has to do it, even though it is harder for some people. There are times when I am not in a situation where I could have a bowel movement even though I need to, but you will never see me intentionally skip it because you are increasing your risk of painful constipation.
You will never see me watch someone struggle- As a physically disabled person, I am limited in how I can help someone because sometimes my physical disability prevents me from being able to do a task. I will never go up to a disabled person and do a task for them without asking if they need my assistance because that is frowned upon. If I see a disabled person struggling to do a task, never will you see me watch them struggle because I have had non-disabled people shut doors in my face and completely ignore me when I needed help. Some disabled people will not want your help, but I will also ask and help them in the best way that I can, and if I can’t help, I will find someone who can.
You will never see me ask a disabled person why they are disabled– Non-disabled people often will go up to a disabled person and ask them what disability they have because they are curious. As a disabled person, I know that not all disabled people want to share their disability stories, and I personally find it annoying when strangers come up to me and ask me that question. Never will you see me go up to complete strangers and ask them why they use a wheelchair, because not all disabled people will feel comfortable sharing. If I get to know someone, sometimes they will voluntarily tell me, but you will never hear me ask someone because you never know if someone’s disability story is traumatic.
I will never make fun of someone because they are acting differently– When you are disabled, it is more difficult to make friends, and sometimes non-disabled people will make fun of you because you are acting differently than everyone. Never will you see me make fun of a disabled person because they are acting differently, and I will always be the person who goes up to someone who looks lonely. I know what it feels like to be made fun of because of your differences, and it doesn’t feel great, and I don’t ever want someone to feel like that. You can’t stop non-disabled people from making fun of people who are different, but you can make sure you aren’t one of them.
You will never see me make fun of medical conditions– Sometimes, I will be in a room full of people who are making fun of people with bowel issues because they think it’s funny to see someone run to the bathroom. I am never that person who starts that conversation because making fun of a medical condition you have never experienced is cruel and hurts disabled people’s feelings. I try to keep a straight face when I am with someone who is making fun of a medical condition because people need to know laughing at someone’s pain is not funny.
When you are disabled, everything in life is hard, but not everything about a disability is bad because it allows you to have a different perspective on life.. Non-disabled people sometimes will go up to strangers and ask them personal questions, but when you are disabled, you don’t do that even if you are curious because you know it’s frowned upon. My disability has given me a better understanding of certain things, and although sometimes I may do things that are not good for your health, for the most part, I am more mindful of my habits. I know my life will be harder if I neglect my health and the last thing I ever would want for myself is to make my life harder than it already is. It is frustrating to be disabled, but because of my disability, I am more understanding of people with differences and can help people in ways non-disabled people can’t. What things would you never do because of your disability? If you liked this post, please leave a comment below and share it with your friends.
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