When you have a physical disability, the simplest task that comes easy to most people is hard because you have limitations that someone without a physical disability wouldn’t have. You are constantly learning new ways to navigate inaccessibility because we live in an inaccessible world that is not designed for disabled people, and barriers are everywhere. It can be hard for a non-disabled person to understand what it’s like to have a visible physical disability because you will never fully understand a disability you have never experienced. Non-disabled people often have an idea of what they think it’s like to have a visible physical disability but often your assumptions are wrong because I can do more than people think I can. Loved ones of disabled people often think they are experts because they know a disabled person, but the only true disability experts are disabled people. There are a lot of things about living with a physical disability that you wouldn’t know unless you had a physical disability. What are some realities of living with a physical disability? In this post, I am sharing some realities of living with a disability that you may not know unless you have one.
You are called an inspiration all the time- When you have an invisible disability, people are not going to be called an inspiration as much because people don’t know you have a disability. If you have a visible physical disability and it’s obvious you are disabled, people will constantly approach you and call you an inspiration for doing literally nothing. Most people mean well when they call a disabled person inspiring and think they are complimenting them, and don’t realize that it’s more of an insult than a compliment. As a physically disabled person, I am constantly called an inspiration, and I can’t even go on my morning walk most days without a total stranger approaching me and calling me an inspiration. Non-disabled people often view disabled people as less than everyone else, and you have to get used to people calling you inspiring for no reason.
You will be talked to like a child– When you have an invisible disability, often people will talk to you normally because they don’t know you are disabled. As soon as people can see you are disabled, they start talking to you like a child because it is often believed that disabled people have less intelligence than non-disabled people. Most disabled people have average intelligence, and you can talk to disabled people in the same way you would to a non-disabled person. Some disabled people have processing issues and may need you to talk slower, but a lot of disabled people have advanced college degrees and can have a conversation as easily as a non-disabled person. One of the most frustrating things about living with a physical disability is that people will talk to you like a baby because they think you can’t understand them.
People will do things for you because they think you can’t- When you have a physical disability, everything in life is harder because your physical disability prevents you from doing some tasks. Sometimes non-disabled people will do tasks for you because they assume you are not able to do that task yourself. My physical disability makes it more difficult to complete everyday tasks, but even though something is hard, that doesn’t mean I am incapable of doing anything for myself and always need help. I have been physically disabled my entire life and have learned how to do tasks to accommodate my disability and am able to do things non-disabled people think I can’t do. One of the most frustrating realities of living with a physical disability is that people will do tasks for you that you don’t need help with because they think you can’t. Disabled people with physical disabilities require more assistance but we are capable of more things than people give us credit for.
You are constantly navigating inaccessibility- People with invisible disabilities that do not have physical challenges often aren’t impacted by inaccessibility as much because they can navigate whether it’s accessible or not. If you are physically disabled and walk with crutches or use a wheelchair, you are constantly navigating inaccessibility because we live in an inaccessible world that thinks accessibility is only for disabled people. There are barriers everywhere, and I can’t even navigate my own home without facing barriers because they don’t even design accessible homes. If a disabled person wants their home to be accessible, they have to do renovations to accommodate their needs which we shouldn’t have to do because all homes should have basic accessibility. We have made some progress with making the world more accessible, but it will never be fully accessible for everyone because everyone has different access needs and it’s impossible to accommodate everyone. As a physically disabled person, I am constantly navigating inaccessibility because sometimes things are not accessible to me and I have to adapt.
You will be left out of some activities– One of the hardest parts of living with a physical disability is that you have to accept that there are some things you won’t be able to do with your non-disabled friends. I am able to do a lot of things with my non-disabled sisters, but I can’t play a game of volleyball and have to watch other people enjoy. I would never want my non-disabled friends not to do an activity because my physical disability prevents me from doing it. It is okay for non-disabled people to do activities that I can’t, and I want you to, because we can always find other activities I can enjoy. It is hard to watch your friends do an activity that you can’t do, but it is a reality of being physically disabled.
People will stare at you-When you have a visible physical disability, often people will stare at you because they are curious. Staring makes disabled people uncomfortable, but you can’t stop people from doing it because people will stare at you whether you want them to or not. If someone is staring at me and I am getting uncomfortable, I will look at them and smile, and more often than not they will look away because you just made it super awkward for them. I don’t like it when people stare, but I am used to it and am no longer bothered by it.
You get used to people making cheesy jokes– Non-disabled people often don’t know how to talk to a disabled person and sometimes will approach a wheelchair user and say things like “do you have license for that thing because I might have to give you a speeding ticket.” Most people who say these jokes think they are being funny and there is nothing wrong with them but it’s cheesy and everyone says it. I smile when people try to crack jokes that are not funny, so I don’t embarrass anyone because all people are trying to do is make conversation. You get used to people making cheesy jokes and pretend they are funny to avoid making it super awkward for them.
People will come up and push your wheelchair without asking- One of the most frustrating things about being a part-time wheelchair user is that people will come to you and start pushing your chair without asking your permission. Sometimes people think you need help and will start pushing you because they think they are helping. Disabled people do not always need to be pushed, and sometimes we want to push our chairs. You should always ask a disabled person if they want to be pushed because doing it without asking is not helpful and is violating someone’s personal space. Disabled people want you to ask before you start pushing us but often people push us without asking.
When you are physically disabled, everything in life is a little harder, and you are constantly frustrated with something because barriers are everywhere. Non-disabled people sometimes think that physically disabled people are less capable than them but we are probably more capable than you give us credit for. There are some things that my physical disability prevents me from doing, but I can do most tasks because I find different ways to do them to accommodate my disability. Living with a physical disability is all about learning to adapt because even though something takes you more time, it doesn’t mean it’s always impossible. It is frustrating to be physically disabled because sometimes people see your disability and think you are less capable than everyone else, but often we are more capable than you think we are. I have even had people within my own family who think they are experts assume I can’t do something that I totally can. If you truly want to understand what it’s like to be physically disabled, you have to talk to disabled people because everything you believe is likely not true. What are some realities of living with your physical disability? If you liked this post, please leave a comment below and share it with your friends.
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